I have no idea why but Rebecca Black was in my dream two nights ago. At first I thought I was gonna have to turn myself into the local authorities but then I remembered she’s 21 now, so I’m good. It wasn’t a bad dream by any stretch of the imagination. It was actually pretty epic; I was with her and Nicholas Cage in a heist situation where we were plotting to rescue someone. Who they are and their importance to the story are both irrelevant. It was wild. But it got me thinking about how the internet mercifully dragged a 13 year old girl online for following her dream and trying to become a famous singer. Rebecca would learn very quickly to never follow your dreams, you’ll end up hurt.

The reviews of the song, to put it lightly, FLAT OUT STUNK. People ripped this song to absolute shreds. Some called it the worst song ever. It was the most disliked video ever on YouTube before it got taken down.

It didn’t stop there, there are people out there who for whatever reason, decided to send her death threats! Imagine being so upset about a song that you send tell a 13 year old to kill herself.

“I hope you go cut yourself and die” 

 “I hope you cut yourself and I hope you get an eating disorder so you’ll look pretty.”

“Even deaf people are complaining”

Source

Okay, hand up, I put that last one in there because it made me laugh, but the point stands, you’re a bad person if you say that stuff to a 13 year old girl. The entire thing jut blows my mind. A teenager releases a song where the lyrics, sound, and video completely fit something a 13 year old would sing about, and she got absolutely ripped for it. The bullying didn’t stop on the internet. The poor girl was picked on so bad by her peers that she had to drop out of school. The more I think about it, this is EXACTLY why Miley Stuart had the Hannah Montana persona. Middle Schoolers are the meanest fucking people on earth. Just absolutely vicious. I’ve long been in the camp that middle school is the pledging process of life but this is simply too far! If people said those things to me I would have my own Wikipedia article and my name would constantly be brought up in gun control debates. Imagine your awkward and embarrassing moments from your pre-teen years published online. A shiver went down my spine just thinking what would happen to me if the sketch comedy shows I made and performed when I was younger were to have been broadcast for the entire world to see. I pretended to be a late night talk show host, where I opened with a garbage monologue, did garbage impersonations, and interviewed garbage stuffed animals. Normal teenager stuff. The point is, we all did regrettable stuff when we were teenagers, and it’s a shame Rebecca’s got put on blast by an entire nation. The fact that she took this all in stride is outstanding, and shows maturity beyond her years.

Now you might be saying, “Well at least she got a ton of money from the song. It couldn’t be all bad for the Black family.” and my response to that would be, “Money didn’t solve all the issues that the Blacks went through on a daily basis. They got called vile, disgusting names. They were talked down to, belittled for no good reason. Plus Rebecca donated all the proceeds from the song to the Japanese Earthquake fund, which rocked our nation back in 2011.” You could say this girl’s life became a living hell after everything she went through, most people would have just taken all the money and just lived in exile until this blew over. But this THIRTEEN YEAR OLD decided to help the people in Japan who were actually going through hell. I’m glad Rebecca didn’t listen to the people online like SkullFucker6969 and BigDong420, who I’m sure both took time out of their very busy days of jerking off on ChatRoulette to tell a 13 year old girl to hang herself. The world is a better place because of it. Now would also be a good time to address that Rebecca was not the only one humiliated by that song. Who can forget her “Friend on the Right” who was also ruthlessly mocked by the internet. However, she set up a foundation thereafter called “The Girl in Pink Foundation” which aims to educate kids on the effects that bullying can have on someone. 

At the end of the day, Rebecca came out of this okay, but what happened to her just shows how toxic the internet is. However, there is good that came from this, the entire fiasco made Rebecca Black mentally tough. Mentally tough enough to pull off an absolutely legendary heist with me.