Each Music Monday will be formatted as followed: an overview/ my opinion on their said career, followed by the ranking of their top 5 songs. No artist is without flaws, their worst three songs will also be judged and ripped to shreds.
As a reminder, this is not going to be a series where I list no-name songs off an artist’s shitty second album that’ll you’ll hear occasionally in an urban coffee shop. We only grade hits here. I’m not looking for songs that have the best underlying message. I’m not looking for songs that represent the artist’s struggle and triumph over something shitty that happened to them. I don’t care about any of that. We are only ranking the cream of the crop, the pinnacle of an artist’s success. Before you ask, I will not be ranking The Beatles’ songs, as I do not want to tarnish my blog with overrated garbage. If you have a problem with that, or my rankings, and want to make your criticisms known, you can email all of your concerns to VinnieWontCheckThis@gmail.com. Prior versions of this series can be found here.
So with that, let’s get started.
WE ONLY GRADE HITS HERE: For the purpose of this blog, I only care about the hits and nothing else about Chris Brown. I don’t have to explain myself.
Christopher Maurice Brown was born on May 5, 1989, in Tappahannock Virginia. Brown taught himself to sing and dance at a young age and often mentioned Michael Jackson as an inspiration. After spending his early teen years singing and partaking in the choir at his local church, he gained the attention of a local record label head who was eager to sign him. The local label later merged with a larger label, which began a bidding war for Chris to sign. After signing a record deal at the age of 15, his debut album came a year later in 2005. The album was a massive success, Chris Brown had his first number one hit at the age of 16 with Run It! (I am not putting the exclamation point because I am excited, I am putting it there because that’s how the song is titled). The album also had two top ten hits (Yo (Excuse Me Miss), Say Goodbye) and a top 15 hit (Gimme That). The album showed the world that Chris Brown was a name that was going to be here for a long time as he was nominated for two Grammy’s for this album. Facing the tall task of following up this album, Chris Brown DELIVERED with his second album, Exclusive, in 2007. He scored his second number one hit (Kiss Kiss) and also had two songs chart at number 2 (With You, Forever). The album also gave us an all time boner jam song (Take You Down). Chris Brown’s career was Forever changed when he did a really really REALLY bad thing that you all are aware of – he released his third album Graffiti which was so bad, listening made me feel like Chris Brown punched me numerous times in the face. (This joke is gonna get me in trouble, I know it). The album had only one song chart in top 20 (I Can Transform Ya). Chris began experimenting with his sound further, working with EDM artists to help produce his 4th album, F.A.M.E which was released in 2011. The album breathed new life into Chris, as it had an array of hits charting in the top 10 (Look at Me Now), top 15 (Yeah 3x) and two in the top 25 (She Ain’t You, Next to You). The “B-Side” of this album, Fortune was released 6 months later in 2012. Outside of the two top 10 hits (Turn Up the Music, Don’t Wake Me Up) the album was t great. A lot of personal issues that I won’t comment on occurred between this and his 5th album, X, was released in 2014, 10 years to the day he signed his first record deal. It had another top 10 hit (Loyal) as well as 3 top 30 hits (Fine China, Love More, New Flame). A joint album with Tyga followed in 2015. That stunk, it had a top 20 stinker song (Ayo) but yea, nothing really to say. His 3 most recent albums have been big stinkers and since. I know that none of those songs will make the top 5, were just going to move to the rankings.
Chris Brown has been apart of numerous features since he came onto the scene, here’s a quick ranking of his best features:
5: Shortie Like Mine -Bow Wow (ft. Chris Brown)
4: Only -Nicki Minaj (ft. Drake Lil Wayne & Chris Brown)
3: Birthday Cake remix/Umbrella Remix- Rihanna (ft. Chris Brown): had to put both on here, they are great.
2: Get Like Me -David Banner (ft Chris Brown and Yung Joc/Jim Jones)
1: No Air- Jordin Sparks (ft. Chris Brown)
Here is the ranking of best Chris Brown songs:
Toughest Omission: Take You Down: If you have a sex playlist, I hope this song is on it. Take You Down would probably be number two on this list if it met the criteria of hitting top 20 on the charts.
5. Gimme That (ft. Lil’ Wayne): this is one of his most overlooked songs if were being honest. Song is a certified heater.
4. With You: this song actually launched Justin Bieber’s career. He covered this song in YouTube video intended for his family to see, Scooter Braun stumbled upon it, and the rest is history. Without this song we don’t get Bieber, which means he doesn’t date Selena Gomez which means the general public never would have to pretend that she’s a good singer. So while this song is great, it gave us a Selena Gomez singing career, and I can’t in good faith put it higher on the list.
3. Run It!: I used to think Chris Brown was saying “its some mayonnaise on the floor if he ate it let me know” my brain did me wrong.
2. Forever: Forever a bop. Even though it’s a completely cliche wedding song there’s no denying that this is a certified hit.
1. Kiss Kiss (ft. T-Pain): I always feel bad for the guy who called in to Nappy Boy Radio with some legit problems just for T-Pain not to listen at all and start playing this tune.
Chris Brown’s Worst Hits
While Chris has hits, it almost feels like a waste of potential and talent because of all his legal issues and being such a terrible human being. The days of him giving us stuff from his first two albums are far gone and it’s a shame because the guy has a generational talent. Whatever, he has $50 million, I’m sure he’s not too worried about it.
Your Turn
If you had a blog and were to rank every Chris Brown song that hit top 20 on the charts, what are your top 5?
| Title | Year | Peak chart positions | Album |
| Run It! (ft. Juelz Santana) | 2005 | 1 | Chris Brown |
| Yo (Excuse Me Miss) | 2005 | 7 | Chris Brown |
| Gimme That (Remix) (ft. Lil Wayne | 2006 | 15 | Chris Brown |
| Say Goodbye | 2006 | 10 | Chris Brown |
| Kiss Kiss | 2007 | 1 | Exclusive |
| With You | 2007 | 2 | Exclusive |
| Forever | 2008 | 2 | Exclusive |
| I Can Transform Ya | 2009 | 20 | Graffiti |
| Deuces (ft. Tyga and Kevin McCall) | 2010 | 14 | F.A.M.E |
| Yeah 3x | 2010 | 15 | F.A.M.E |
| Look At Me Now (ft. Busta Rhymes & Lil Wayne) | 2011 | 6 | F.A.M.E |
| Turn Up the Music | 2012 | 10 | Fortune |
| Don’t Wake Me Up | 2012 | 10 | Fortune |
| Loyal | 2013 | 9 | X |
| Ayo (ft. Tyga) | 2015 | 20 | Fan of a Fan: The Album |
| Back to Sleep | 2015 | 20 | Royalty |
Vin'sane Thoughts 
[…] however, because, just like I didn’t talk about Chris Brown’s issues when I did his Music Monday– we only grade hits here. (However, if you want a refresher on the three year ordeal that […]
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