Each Music Monday will be formatted as followed: an overview/ my opinion on their said career, followed by the ranking of their top 5 songs. No artist is without flaws, their worst three songs will also be judged and ripped to shreds.

As a reminder, this is not going to be a series where I list no-name songs off an artist’s shitty second album that’ll you’ll hear occasionally in an urban coffee shop. We only grade hits here. I’m not looking for songs that have the best underlying message. I’m not looking for songs that represent the artist’s struggle and triumph over something shitty that happened to them. I don’t care about any of that. We are only ranking the cream of the crop, the pinnacle of an artist’s success. Before you ask, I will not be ranking The Beatles’ songs, as I do not want to tarnish my blog with overrated garbage. If you have a problem with that, or my rankings, and want to make your criticisms known, you can email all of your concerns to VinnieWontCheckThis@gmail.com. Prior versions of this series can be found here.

Let me start this post by saying I think end-of-the-year lists are corny. However, with everyone still being in Christmas mode, no artist really felt right to do at the moment. We will return to our regularly scheduled programming next week, but I figured I’d try something different and just review this decade. The rules to this one are simple- I am taking the top 20 songs from Billboard’s yearly best selling songs list, and I will rank and talk about the best 3 for that given year. I’m gonna see how this turns out, and if it stinks I’ll probably just kill myself.

So with that, let’s get started.

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2010

3. Dynamite – Taio Cruz

2. Tik Tok – Ke$ha

1. California Gurls (ft. Snoop Dogg) -Katy Perry

2010 started the decade off with some bangers, no doubt. The world was introduced to Kesha, Katy Perry began an unprecedented 3 year run at the top of the music industry, and it gave us a strange 6 month period where B.o.B was the number one rapper in the world. All in all, ranking this year was pretty easy, as the top 3 songs were head and shoulders above the rest. California Gurls and Tik Tok are bangers that hold up to this day, and who can forget about Taio Cruz giving us two number one hits and falling off the face of the earth.

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2011

3. Rolling in the Deep – Adele

2. Super Bass – Nicki Minaj

1. Moves Like Jagger (ft. Christina Aguilera) – Maroon 5

On a song basis, this was the year of Party Rock Anthem; On an artist basis, this was the year of Katy Perry if you look at the charts, but to me Adele’s impact on the industry cannot be overstated. All in all, 2011 was a strong year if you loved pop music because there are some real hits on this list. The top three for this year is really based on personal preference but I will acknowledge that there are a lot of opinions to be had on the top three songs from this strong year.

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2012

3. Call Me Maybe – Carly Rae Jepsen

2. Starships – Nicki Minaj

1. What Makes You Beautiful- One Direction

What a strange year for music – Somebody That I Used to Know being the top song for the year tells you everything you need to know about 2012. 2012 was another year where the top songs are pretty top heavy. A lot of the songs on this list were huge when they came out, but really do not hold up today. As big as it was, I don’t know a single person still listening to We Are Young. I kinda wish the world ended given this garbage year of music – however, we were given One Direction, so all is not lost.

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2013

3. Blurred Lines (ft. Pharrell & T.I) -Robin Thicke: (As problematic as this sing is, boy it’s a hit).

2. Get Lucky (ft. Pharrell) – Daft Punk

1. I Knew You Were Trouble – Taylor Swift

2013 was the year of Pharrell. This was the first time I remembered the Harlem Shake in 6 years. What a wild couple of months that period was. I have a joke… Harlem Shake? More like Harlem Shame that this was ever a thing. Fried’em. This was also the only time Macklemore was considered ‘cool’ and I say that as genuinely as I can. I will however, admit that Can’t Hold Us still holds up to this day, those piano keys are dope and Ray Dalton has such a sweet velvety voice. This was the year of sad songs though, and you can attribute that to the Jonas Brothers breaking up.

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2014

3 (tie). All of Me/ Stay With Me- John Legend/ Sam Smith

2. Dark Horse (ft. Juicy J) – Katy Perry

1. Timber (ft. Ke$ha) – Pitbull

The reason for the tie here is because both are beautiful love songs sung by very talented individuals. I almost gave the nod to Stay With Me because when you realize that All of Me is written about that fat-faced Chrissy Teigan the song sort of loses its appeal. She’s the worst and I will die on that hill. This was a pretty weak year for music tbh – one of the weakest for the decade for sure. I also should note it was around this time that people told me that Iggy Azalea is gonna replace Nicki Minaj as the premier female rapper, I have receipts, it will never cease to amaze me how dumb people are.

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2015

3. Where Are Ü Now (Ft. Justin Bieber) – Skrillex & Diplo

2. Can’t Feel My Face. – The Weeknd

1. Uptown Funk – Bruno Mars & Mark Ronson

This year was dominated by the top three songs (not mine, but the top three selling songs of the year). It was really weird, during the week, it was like the radio was only able to play those same three songs non stop before giving us all the other songs on this list during The Weeknd (booooooooooo). This year also marked the beginning of Taylor Swift’s decline. It’s a shame she hasn’t been able to come back from releasing that atrocity that is Bad Blood. Should also note that Eye miss Fetty Wap; come back you one-eyed monster.

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2016

3. This is What You Came For (ft. Rihanna) – Calvin Harris

2. Sorry – Justin Bieber

1. Closer (ft. Halsey) – The Chainsmokers

After being the internet’s punching bag for four years, Justin Bieber came back with a VENGEANCE. 2016 was his year. My thoughts on this year in music are a mixed bag. As big as One Dance was, I honestly haven’t listened to it in years so I couldn’t in good faith put it in my top 3. Closer was so massive that it spawned 2 years being in the top 10. I associate it with 2016 more, so I included it on this year’s ranking.

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2017

3. Mask Off- Future

2. Bad and Boujee – Migos

1. 24k Magic – Bruno Mars

I almost put Despacito on here instead of Mask Off but I got so sick of it that I couldn’t. In terms of ranking these, I’m not really sure if I should be ranking them based on how I felt about them when they came out or how they hold up today. I haven’t listened to Bad and Boujee in a minute, but I couldn’t stop listening to it when it was big, and since I don’t love anything else really from this year, it makes the cut. I loved 24k Magic then, now, forever. This was a weird year for music – a decent mix of genres. The summer of XO Tour Lif3 was a fun one though.

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2018

3. Havana (ft. Young Thug) – Camilla Cabalo

2. Nice For What – Drake

1. New Rules – Dua Lipa

I never consider myself a big Drake guy but I enjoy his big songs when they first come out. I won’t listen to anything after it’s off the radio, it could be because it’s all overplayed or I’m just a commercial sheep. Nice for What is great though. My thoughts on Dua Lipa are well known through the grapevines of this blog, so while you may not agree with that song being number one, it’s my ranking. Post Malone was huge this year but felt really overshadowed by Drake. I like Post, he doesn’t stink, but he looks like he smells.

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2019

3. Sicko Mode (ft. Drake) – Travis Scott

2. Wow – Post Malone

1. Old Town Road (ft. Billy Ray Cyrus)

I’m not sure how we’re gonna look back on this year, Ariana dominated the early portion of 2019, but then Old Town Road became the biggest song of all time but for the most part it was a pretty meh year for music. I’m not a fan of a lot of songs on this list, which is why I found myself listening to a lot of older songs. I’m sick of Sicko Mode now, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it when it was big. Old Town Road is my guilty pleasure and I find it very enjoyable.

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Again, decade lists are dumb and corny but I actually had a really hard time doing this. When you rank artists, the sounds are similar, you know what works and what doesn’t. Comparing Sam Hunt to Drake is way more difficult because they are so different. All in all, the 2010’s were a good but not great decade for music. That’s obviously going to change as more time passes and we filter out all the garbage that got released during this time. The reason why older decades of music are looked upon more fondly is because the bad stuff never made it out of the decade – you’re literally only getting the best of the best from those given years. The world won’t know what Gucci Gang is in 20 years and a lot of these flash in the pan songs will fade into obscurity.